MeeAugraphie

Sorrow’s Quilt

She was both

prepared
- and –
absolutely not.

For who can prepare
for the removal of
a living breathing speaking thinking loving mom?

She, as I before her, knew it was soon to be,

tears fell
recriminations took their stance,

loving words
and
memories
bounced among them,

what ifs why did why nots oh nos
raced from self to earth to sky to those
whose hearts were opened and back to self.

Her smiles dared, on occasion, sprout unbidden,
some with guilt attached,
others with pure joy shouting beside them,

but in the midst of tears and smiles…
but in the midst of thoughts sought, found,

stumbled past blindly,

truths stopped her short to feed her grief…
truths pulled her onto her feet,

propelled her forward.

Her hesitant steps made way
for an occasional confident stride.
She could deal with this, for she had learned
- again –
just how loved she was,
and not just by She-who-would-soon-leave
but by those who remained on earth.

Today, she was slapped
by the wicked reality of life:

despite all gained
despite all remained

her mother’s living breathing speaking thinking loving
presence on this earth was no more.

It will be future tomorrows before she finds
the strength to unwrap herself from this
quilt of sorrow
to wear the quilt of life
her mother granted her —
the one she hoped her child
would always wear
with joy.

Marcia McLees Bogaert
05/14/08

Written in reaction to the death today of C’s mom.